Friday, July 24, 2009

Nothing Makes Sense Anymore.

Ok...Last year I stayed home for my first year of college. Taking this step of faith is making my stomach churn. My mom said, "Honey, this is God's Will or it wouldn't of happened as fast as it did.For some reason you are meant to be there. You can relax about that. You're doing whats right." I have friends waiting for me in the Branson area and I have a friend whose brother lives in Springfield so his mom and him visit the area all the time. Also I know when friends come to Branson they can come to me or I can go to them. :) hehe!

I've been thinking about who I am and who I'm meant to be. I am very scared of what is going on. My world is turning upside down. I know that God is doing something but I can't quite put a finger on it. I know something is about to happen...I know what I'm feeling, but... I was trying to figure out what is going on and I was talking to my friends about it and they didn't understand what I was trying to explain. They just looked at me with a blank expression. I don't know. My head is spinning from everything. I am moving forward, yet but I feel like I'm being left behind. Its a weird feeling. Less then three weeks and I leave. I am trying to make sense of everything and nothing seems to make sense. Maybe in a few years it will. haha. I am looking back trying to decide whats coming next. It seems like when I am trying to decide what to do next I look back and make my decisions from previous lessons.This is a brand new game and unfamiliar territory so there is nothing to take this from. So I'm....Anxious....Or whatever you want to call it. Its like I'm all feelings and can't describe how I feel. Anyone understand the confussion?

Always,
Megan